Sent in response to yet another letter from Lloyd Hoffman, our perennial village idiot. Beyond an acute addiction to alliteration (the whole thing hangs off the phrase “prattling preachery”), I think I have writer’s OCD — I tweaked this for at least three days before finally submitting it. And I’m still not really happy with it…
– Monsieur Jacques d’Nalgar, November 21, 2015
Oh my little brother, where art thou NOW?! Week after week your letters, pregnant with petulant, prattling preachery raging against the black man in the White House, parade your naked paranoia and your ponderous morality for all to see. Who anointed you and your amen corner arbiters of who is — and who is not — Christian?
Confessing camaraderie with radio rabble-rouser Mark Levin reveals much. Like you, he hates Obama, hates Muslims, and dearly loves Israel, more even than he loves Dear Homeland. Levin, by the way, thinks your Grandiose Old Party is “thoroughly corrupt, craven, unprincipled, and unconstitutional.” Imagine what he thinks of my godless Democrats!
You and little Mark Levin. What a team! Despite your wild accusations, Israel has never had a better friend than this president. Favorite spy Jonathan Pollard was just released. Security assistance to Israel has increased every year since Obama took office and over the past three years, he’s given them nearly $10 billion just in military aid.
That’s about 20 percent higher than the remaining six dozen recipients of U.S. Foreign Military Financing combined. And sadly, all while ignoring Israel’s plunge into the madness of fascism and apartheid. All while Palestinians are told they must never resist, but be forever meek as sheep bound for the abattoir…
Your insinuations that Obama is a clandestine Muslim would be laughable were they not contemptible. So what if he was? Islam is not new to America. The first Muslims came here in chains, as African slaves, and they’ve been coming ever since. But now, somehow, fearing and loathing these fellow Americans is an acceptable and righteous thing. Even before the horrors of Paris, your good-godly Republican candidates and governors were shamelessly peddling Islamophobia. Since Paris, that clown car has only gotten louder and sillier. I can only imagine that you and your buddy Mark Levin are giddy at the prospect of shuttered mosques and Muslim ankle bracelets.
Despair comes easily in this gathering gloom, as we witness the rise of regressives in America. But perhaps this season of big flags and bigots masquerading as Christian patriots is the last hurrah of a frightened generation that will soon shuffle off this mortal coil. Perhaps our long winter of malfeasance and mendacity, which neither kept us safe nor trickled prosperity, has finally run its bloody course. Never forget that WE THE PEOPLE managed to elect — twice! — an unlikely brown-skinned Hawaiian community organizer with a Kenyan father and a middle name of “Hussein.”
Obama said it best. “My parents shared not only an improbable love, they shared an abiding faith in the possibilities of this nation.” Pray that we soon emerge from this present darkness, from this senseless, shameful surrender to our worst impulses. Pray that we once again find that abiding faith in the possibilities of this nation, and in the possibilities of all of us who live, together, on this amazing, beautiful world.
Your bigger brother,
Hot Springs, Arkansas