149 results for d'Nalgar

Mar 22 2018

Beseeching the Almighty to please hurry

Dear editor:

For letter writers beseeching the Almighty to please hurry up and make Mike Nunn pray the sinner’s prayer or walk the Roman Road, or whatever the latest trick is for getting past St. Peter and the Pearly Gates, take a break from your earnest lamentations and look around. Notice all those empty pews? Brothers and sisters, the salvation of Mr. Nunn is hardly Christendom’s biggest problem. Your more immediate concern should be that your fellow saints are fleeing … [more]

Permanent link to this article: http://levantium.com/2018/03/22/beseeching-the-almighty-to-please-hurry/

Feb 21 2018


Dear editor:

America is awash in an eschatological frenzy of flummery. So when news about Mueller’s investigation of our pouty POTUS’s son-in-law began focusing on shenanigans surrounding foreign financing of his building in New York City, my end-times spider sense began to tingle!

People, you cannot make this stuff up. The address of that building is 666 Fifth Avenue. For all you nimble numerologists and prognosticating prophets, does the number 666 sound familiar? Ever curious, I went to Lord Google … [more]

Permanent link to this article: http://levantium.com/2018/02/21/666/

Jan 28 2018

Response to the Muslim


Following is today’s flash of brilliance by one of our local islamophobic lunatics. Such is the brightness of his keen intellect (the noon-day sun pales in comparison), that were he to  focus his facile faculties on any problem large or small, surely that problem would wither and die.  Behold now, a mind like no other.  A man who needs no introduction, a man who has Jan Morgan’s back, the one, the only…

…come to think of it, idiots chasing … [more]

Permanent link to this article: http://levantium.com/2018/01/28/response-to-the-muslim/

Dec 21 2017

Believing like Jesus

A wonderful time of year

Monsieur d’Nalgar:  Mr. Lindholm informed me of several corrections that are now reflected herein.  These corrections were made via social media after the letter was published in the Sentinel Record…  The comments that follow were also harvested from social media.  Vendredi 22 décembre 2017 à l’ère commune.  Joyeux Noël à tous!

Dear editor:

It’s a wonderful time of the year.

The world is captivated by the story of the birth of Jesus. It is a … [more]

Permanent link to this article: http://levantium.com/2017/12/21/believing-like-jesus/

Nov 24 2017

Preserve this precious heritage



Several months ago, my friend Betty Halaby, an exile from Palestinian Jerusalem, gave me the following article, printed on three pages in all caps. Searching for an online version to copy here, I ran across this fitting preface:

— Monsieur d’Nalgar, Vendredi 24 novembre 2017 à l’ère commune


…it has always been a very short distance from serious social science to parody, and many have enjoyed the trip. Probably the most frequently reprinted example is Horace Miner’s … [more]

Permanent link to this article: http://levantium.com/2017/11/24/preserve-this-precious-heritage/

Oct 23 2017

He was too stuck up


The following letter to the editor, titled “Crooked stuff”, appeared in the Sunday, October 23, 2017 edition of the Sentinel Record.  It’s typical codswallop from exalted sister Mary Robinson (bless her heart), so no further introduction is necessary.  The photographs that follow represent about a minute of Google searching…

— Monsieur d’Nalgar, Lundi 23 octobre 2017


Dear editor:

When someone is lying and doing a bunch of crooked stuff and you know they’re lying and doing a … [more]

Permanent link to this article: http://levantium.com/2017/10/23/he-was-too-stuck-up/

Oct 17 2017

Because a few inky wretches say so


Hot Springs, Arkansas, with its deep lakes and “sin city” notoriety, is the unnatural habitat of shallow-thinking, obsessive letter writers (I’d throw in fundamentalist, too, but that would just be piling on tautological tomfoolery).  Little brother Lloyd Hoffman (endlessly quoting Billy’s boy Franklin Graham) and little sister Mary Robinson (oy vey! will she stop already with her “America, bless God” adieus?!) are just two that come to mind…

My latest response to these clannish brethren, these self-righteous christianists trying … [more]

Permanent link to this article: http://levantium.com/2017/10/17/because-a-few-inky-wretches-say-so/