Paraprosdokians

A bit of levity from my friend Sharifah…

A paraprosdokian (plural paraprosdokians), from the Ancient Greek παρά (para, “against”) + προσδοκία (prosdokia, “expectation”), is a figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently used in a humorous situation.

  • Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
  • The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it’s still on my list.
  • Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
  • If I agreed with you, we’d both be wrong.
  • Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
  • To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
  • A bus station is where a bus stops… A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station.
  • I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted pay checks.
  • I didn’t say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
  • Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
  • You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
  • Money can’t buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
  • I used to be indecisive. Now I’m not so sure.
  • You’re never too old to learn something stupid.
  • To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.
  • Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
  • When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.
  • The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

Related Posts

Outposts forever and Palestine Never Newt Gingrich may be able to occupy Palestine, but Israel can't By Bradley Burston, 15:17 13.12.11 ... Speaker Gingrich, if you're serious abou...
Rights and wrongs are rather more complex Syria's Shades of Gray By William Dalrymple, June 07, 2003   The United States has probably never been more engaged in the Middle East t...
Dona nobis pacem Peace on earth? The end of the Iraq war By Susan Brooks Thistlethwaite, 11:01 AM ET, 12/15/2011 ... “Peace on earth!” (Luke 2:14) heralded the ...
Wise to fear Was Democracy Just a Moment? By Robert D. Kaplan, Friday, December 16, 2011 ... IN the fourth century A.D. Christianity's conquest of Europe ...
Grow your own The parable of the allotments By Julian Baggini, Thursday 15 December 2011 12.53 EST ... Last week I challenged the idea that religiosity is ...
Who are we? Newt, Mitt, Bibi and Vladimir By Thomas L. Friedman, December 13, 2011 ... I have a simple motto when it comes to the Israeli-Palestinian confl...
Against all odds?   Note:  The above foolishness was seen tonight at our local Sam's Club.  The image below is of the back side of this "extraordinary ...
According to the dictionary   I place an ear on the belly of this moment I hear wailing I place it on another moment - the same! - Sinan Antoon, Iraqi poet ...
Dwindling congregations PROOFS OF GOD IN A PHOTON By Martin Redfern, Sunday 24 December 1995 ... FOR THE first time in 400 years, sensible people are saying some ver...
Enormous self-regard Newt, the Jews, and an “Invented” People By David  Remnick, December 11, 2011 ... Late last week, as part of a Republican pander-fest for the J...

Permanent link to this article: https://levantium.com/2011/08/31/paraprosdokians/

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.